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The Power of Watching Your Children Play: A Simple Act That Can Heal Your Mind

  • Writer: Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
    Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
  • Apr 7

Watching your children play allows you to experience the pure joy of the present moment, free from the pressures of daily life. It’s a simple, yet powerful reminder that sometimes, the best way to refresh your mind is to simply observe their carefree world.

The Power of Watching Your Children Play: A Simple Act That Can Heal Your Mind

As parents, we often find ourselves caught in the whirlwind of daily life—working, planning, and constantly thinking ahead. We juggle responsibilities, manage to-do lists, and worry about what the future holds for ourselves and our children. In the midst of all the busyness, it’s easy to overlook the small moments of calm that can actually be profound for our mental well-being.


One of those moments? Watching your children play.


It might sound counterintuitive at first. After all, we live in a society that celebrates productivity. We often feel guilty about “wasting time” if we're not always on the go. But in reality, taking the time to watch your child play can offer you a chance to reset, recharge, and reconnect with the present moment.


The Calm of Simplicity


Children’s play, while full of imagination and boundless energy, is inherently simple. It’s not about achieving goals or completing tasks—it’s about experiencing joy and engaging with the world around them in a way that feels light and free. When you watch them play, you're invited to observe their unfiltered creativity and unburdened happiness.


It’s easy for adults to get caught up in the complex, often overwhelming nature of life, constantly planning for the future or revisiting the past. Watching your children immerse themselves in the present allows you to temporarily escape from that mental clutter. It reminds you that life doesn’t have to be full of complicated to-do lists to be meaningful—it’s about being here, now.


A Natural Mind Reset


When you're in the midst of your child’s play, you're naturally drawn to their rhythm. Whether it's building a fort, playing make-believe, or simply running around outside, you're invited to relax and observe. Your mind isn’t distracted by deadlines or worries. You’re simply watching them experience the world in a way that is carefree and light. This shift allows you to clear your head and put down the emotional weight you may carry from constant thinking and planning.


There’s something uniquely calming about watching children engage in activities that don’t demand anything from you. You’re not required to take action or solve any problems; you’re just a witness to their joy. This is often a rare opportunity in our adult lives when we don’t have to do anything except exist in the moment.


The Importance of Being Present


One of the most significant benefits of watching your child play is the invitation to be present. In today’s fast-paced world, we’re constantly thinking ahead—about what we need to do next, what we might be missing, or what could go wrong. But when we focus on the simplicity of a child’s game, we learn to tune out distractions and embrace the now.


By grounding yourself in the present, you create space for clarity and mindfulness. The worries about the future and the distractions from the past fade into the background, and you gain the mental space to process your emotions more calmly. It’s a small act, but it can have a profound impact on your mental health.


Quality Time for Both Parent and Child


There’s a special kind of bonding that occurs when you take time to sit with your child and watch them engage in their own world of play. You’re not only giving yourself a break from the mental stress of daily life, but you’re also fostering a deeper connection with your child. In a way, their play becomes a mirror for your own mindfulness. You learn to embrace the beauty of simplicity, of just “being” instead of “doing.”


It’s a moment where both parent and child can share in the peacefulness of the present, without the weight of responsibilities hanging overhead. You’re giving yourself permission to pause, which can be incredibly rejuvenating.


The Hidden Mental Health Benefits


While taking the time to watch your child may seem like a passive activity, it’s actually quite therapeutic. Research in mindfulness and mental health suggests that simple acts of observation—especially those that focus on the present—can reduce stress, lower anxiety, and help individuals feel more balanced emotionally. Watching your child play gives you a mental break, reducing the constant stream of overthinking that leads to burnout.


The act of watching also creates a mental shift from the overwhelming “what’s next?” to the calming “what’s now?” This can provide you with a sense of perspective and relief from the weight of future-oriented anxiety. The simplicity of your child’s enjoyment helps you reconnect with the present and see things from a fresh, clearer perspective.


Final Thoughts


So, the next time you find yourself watching your child play, remember—it’s not time wasted. It’s time well spent. It’s an opportunity to breathe, clear your mind, and simply be. In a world that often encourages us to do more, the simple act of observing and being present with your child can have remarkable benefits for your mental health.


After all, in a time when everything feels so rushed, isn’t it nice to be reminded that the best moments are often the simplest?


Question to Reflect On: How often do you allow yourself to simply be present and take in the joy of the moment—especially through the eyes of your child? How can you use these moments to give your mind the break it deserves?


💬 Ready to start your own healing journey?


Book a session with one of our compassionate therapists at Moody Melon Counseling. We’re here when you’re ready. 🍉



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Wellness Without the Price Tag: 5 Simple Ways to Boost Your Mood and Motivation at Home

  • Writer: Niki Kay | Wellness Podcast Host | Guest Writer
    Niki Kay | Wellness Podcast Host | Guest Writer
  • Apr 6

What if I told you that the real reason we spend big bucks on luxury gym memberships or fancy yoga retreats isn’t just for the experience, but for the motivation to actually follow through on our wellness goals? At that point, you’re essentially paying for motivation alone. But here’s the thing, you can reap all the same wellness benefits right from the comfort of your own home, without shelling out large amounts of cash every month.

Wellness Without the Price Tag: 5 Simple Ways to Boost Your Mood and Motivation at Home

Now, this is where it gets tricky. Without the guilt of a monthly membership fee holding you accountable, your motivation will have to come from within. It will need to be rooted in self-discipline and commitment to yourself. But here’s the reward: you’ll still get that dopamine hit, the neurotransmitter responsible for how we feel.


By engaging in activities that naturally boost dopamine, you activate your brain’s reward center, creating a self-sustaining cycle of motivation. This not only keeps you committed but also helps regulate cortisol levels, the hormone responsible for stress, ultimately reducing the effects of anxiety and depression on your body.


1. Get Playful with Dopamine Dressing (Your Inner-Child Will Love This)


The term “Dopamine Dressing” was coined by Dawnn Karen, a professor and fashion psychologist. This theory revolves around choosing clothing that makes you feel happy. Since then, the trend has gained widespread popularity, as seen across social media and even on celebrity red carpets.


In simple terms, dopamine dressing is about embracing bold, bright colors and playful designs, wearing pieces that make your brain feel like it’s at play. A 2012 study published by the University of Hertfordshire found a direct link between mood and clothing choices. The findings suggest that making an effort to dress well, especially on low-mood days, can trigger the brain to release dopamine, the "Happy Hormone."


Enhancing our outward appearance is known to provide an instant confidence boost. On days when you feel stuck in a funk, that’s when dressing up in a way that feels most authentic to you can make the biggest difference. Ultimately, the key is to wear what makes you look and feel your best!


2. Dance to Your Favorite Music (Somedays Just a Headbop Would Do!)


This one might be the simplest but also the most fun. Dancing to your favorite music can happen anytime, anywhere—your living room, the shower, the elevator up to work, the kitchen, literally anywhere. You don’t have to spend money or carve out time for a dance class (though if you can, more power to you!).


A Harvard Medical School article from winter 2015 referenced a Columbia University neuroscientist who described dancing as a “pleasure double play.” Music activates the brain’s reward system, while dance engages the body’s muscles and senses. But the most beautiful thing about dancing? It transports you to the best place possible—the present moment. And being present frees you from the grip of depression, which dwells on past mistakes that can’t be changed, and anxiety, which fixates on an uncertain future that hasn’t arrived.


Even if everything else on this list feels hard to maintain in your busy schedule, there’s no excuse not to hit play on your favorite song and move—whether it’s a head bob, a foot tap, or a hip roll.


3. Go on Hot Girl (or Guy) Walks


What started as a TikTok trend in November 2020 has taken off across the world. The creator of the trend, Mia Lind, described the Hot Girl Walk on CBS News as a four-mile walk where you focus on three things: what you’re grateful for, your goals and how you’re going to achieve them, and—of course—how hot you are. While the trend has a playful touch, there’s actually a deeper neurological perspective behind it.


El País described walking as having the power to "cure almost anything," even going as far as saying that the same mental calm achieved through meditation can be reached by simply walking for 20 to 30 minutes a day. The reason? Walking doesn’t just trigger dopamine release—it also boosts serotonin, the neurotransmitter responsible for maintaining daily mood balance.


A daily walk keeps these levels high, giving you the mental wellness boost you need to take on the day. But on days when you just don’t feel like going out, or the weather isn’t cooperating, consider simply walking inside your house. You can do it while waiting for pasta to cook, coffee to brew, scrolling on social media, or even catching up with a friend on the phone. The goal is simple- et those steps in however it works best for you.


4. Take a Hot Shower (or a Few If You Need It!)


Speaking of dopamine and serotonin, the feel-good hormones, there’s another key player in our mood: cortisol, aka the stress hormone. It’s not just about boosting the happy chemicals; managing stress levels is just as important. According to Health Hub by Valley Oaks, hot showers have the power to reduce anxiety and depression while relieving stress by soothing tense muscles. No matter when you take one—morning, night, or somewhere in between—hot showers signal the nervous system to slow down and relax.


As someone who swears by the power of a hot shower, I can tell you—sometimes, it’s exactly what your mind and body need when they’re running a hundred miles an hour in a highly anxious state. And other times, it’s the pick-me-up you need when getting out of bed feels impossible. Your shower doesn’t require you to leave the house or spend any money, so don’t hesitate to take as many showers as you need to reset. If that means three to four in a day to get out of a funk, so be it.


5. Get Smiling and Laughing More (Even If You Have to Fake It at First!)


Last but not least, and potentially the easiest to adopt, is the act of smiling. Simply smiling tricks your brain into thinking it’s having a good time. Psychology Today explains in an article that whether a smile is real or fake, the movement of your facial muscles shifts facial bones, increasing blood flow to the frontal lobe and boosting dopamine. This simple act can help combat the negative effects of stress, reduce feelings of anxiety, and lift your mood when dealing with depression.


The more you spend time doing things that make you smile or laugh, whether it’s watching funny videos, comedy shows, or hanging out with people who lift your mood, you’re shifting your focus away from yourself and the stresses of daily life. As a result, you’re keeping your mood lighter and more relaxed, which naturally supports your mental health in a way that’s simple to weave into your everyday routine.


Conclusion


Wellness doesn’t have to be about big, grand gestures. In fact, when we’re feeling stuck or in a funk, that’s when prioritizing wellness matters most, because the big grand gestures can feel overwhelming. So, what’s the solution? Start small. Focus on what’s right in front of you. Choose practices that don’t require a lot of time, money, or mental effort—things you can easily incorporate into your daily life from the comfort of your own home. By doing this, we take the pressure off ourselves while still embracing all that life has to offer.


💬 Ready to start your own healing journey?


Book a session with one of our compassionate therapists at Moody Melon Counseling. We’re here when you’re ready. 🍉



References:

Carlie Malott

Niki Kay

Host of the Mindset Mentress Podcast | Guest Writer of Moody Melon Magazine

I'm a writer, podcast host, and entrepreneur focused on self-discovery and transformation. Through my podcast, Mindset Mentress, I share insights on authenticity and growth. Currently pursuing a journalism certification at NYU to enhance my storytelling and impact.

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How Abandonment Issues Fuel the Push and Pull in Borderline Personality

  • Writer: Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
    Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
  • Apr 5

The push and pull dynamic in Borderline Personality Disorder often leads individuals to both desperately seek connection and fear it at the same time. This internal conflict can create a cycle where the person alternates between pushing others away and pulling them back in, struggling to find stability in their relationships.

How Abandonment Issues Fuel the Push and Pull in Borderline Personality

What if the root of our most challenging relationships lies in the deepest, unhealed parts of our childhood?


Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) often brings with it a wave of complex emotional experiences. Among the most significant of these is the chronic fear of abandonment—a fear that can shape relationships in the most painful, unpredictable ways. For those struggling with BPD, the impact of abandonment in childhood isn't just a past hurt; it becomes a constant shadow that lingers over every connection, shaping how they relate to others, and often leaving them caught in a push-and-pull cycle.


The Roots of Abandonment in Childhood


At its core, BPD is rooted in emotional dysregulation, which is deeply intertwined with childhood experiences of instability, neglect, or abandonment. Imagine being a child who, at a time when love and safety are vital, is left to fend emotionally for themselves. This lack of secure attachment can lead to a deep internal wound—one that screams for connection but fears it at the same time. The child grows up not knowing how to trust others or how to allow themselves to be loved fully.



For individuals with BPD, the fear of abandonment doesn’t just exist in the back of their minds—it is front and center in their lives. The thought of being rejected or left alone can be so overwhelming that it triggers extreme reactions. When they sense even the smallest distance or perceived neglect in a relationship, they may push people away in a desperate attempt to avoid being hurt. On the flip side, when they feel abandoned or rejected, they may cling desperately, creating a paradox of wanting closeness but fearing it at the same time.


The Push and Pull: Why Can't I Let Go?


For someone with BPD, relationships can feel like a rollercoaster—full of intense highs and devastating lows. One moment, they may feel deeply connected to someone, and the next, a perceived slight can cause them to withdraw or lash out. This “push and pull” dynamic is the result of the intense emotional extremes they experience.


At the heart of it all is an internal battle: the desire for closeness and connection, combined with an overwhelming fear of abandonment. It’s a vicious cycle where love is both something to crave and something to fear. A person with BPD might push others away to avoid the pain of potential rejection, only to feel the loneliness of that very action and pull people back in, only to repeat the cycle.


This pattern isn’t just difficult for the person with BPD, but also for their loved ones who struggle to understand the emotional intensity and inconsistency. They might feel confused or helpless when their partner or friend pulls away, only to later demand all of their attention and reassurance. The back-and-forth nature of these relationships can often feel emotionally draining for both parties involved.


Healing the Wounds of Abandonment


Healing from the emotional wounds caused by abandonment is complex but possible. Therapy, particularly Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), has proven to be one of the most effective treatments for people with BPD. DBT helps individuals develop emotional regulation skills, allowing them to recognize and manage their intense feelings, while also teaching strategies for building healthy, trusting relationships.



Another important aspect of healing involves self-compassion. For many with BPD, the inner critic can be just as harsh as the external fears of abandonment. Learning to accept and care for oneself—without relying on others to fill that emotional void—is key to breaking free from the cycle of abandonment fear.


Support groups can also be instrumental in the healing process, allowing individuals to share their experiences with others who truly understand the pain of living with BPD. In these spaces, the person with BPD can find validation, reassurance, and a sense of belonging, helping them to combat the loneliness and isolation that often accompany their disorder.


Moving Forward: What Does True Connection Look Like?


It’s important to remember that while BPD is deeply rooted in childhood trauma, it does not have to define one’s future. With proper treatment, emotional growth, and a supportive network, individuals with BPD can develop healthier, more stable relationships and begin to rebuild their sense of self-worth.


If you or someone you love struggles with abandonment fears and relationship instability, it’s crucial to recognize that healing is possible. The journey may be long, but it’s worth it for the possibility of lasting connection and peace.


Are we ready to break the cycle of fear and embrace the realness of love, trust, and connection?


💬 Ready to start your own healing journey?


Book a session with one of our compassionate therapists at Moody Melon Counseling. We’re here when you’re ready. 🍉



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