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  • Writer: Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
    Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
  • Jan 9

DBT group counseling provides trauma survivors with a supportive environment where they can learn valuable coping skills, such as emotional regulation and mindfulness, while connecting with others who share similar experiences. In these sessions, participants practice communication, boundary-setting, and emotional management techniques to foster healing and resilience.

Healing in Numbers: What a DBT Group Counseling Session for Trauma Clients Looks Like

Trauma can shape the way we experience the world, often leaving emotional scars that feel too deep to heal. For many people, the trauma they’ve endured can lead to a range of mental health issues—anxiety, depression, self-destructive behaviors, and intense emotional reactions. The road to healing is not a solitary one, and for trauma survivors, group counseling offers a unique blend of support, connection, and the learning of valuable skills. One of the most effective therapeutic modalities for trauma clients is Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), a therapy designed to help individuals navigate intense emotions, build healthier relationships, and develop coping strategies. But what does a DBT group counseling session look like when it's focused on trauma survivors?


1. Creating a Safe and Supportive Environment: DBT is rooted in the principle of radical acceptance—the idea that clients should accept themselves and their experiences without judgment. For trauma clients, this means creating a safe space where they can be vulnerable without fear of rejection or invalidation. The group facilitator sets the tone by emphasizing confidentiality, respect, and understanding. In a trauma-focused DBT group, trust is paramount.


The facilitator may begin by asking group members how they’re feeling that day, allowing space for everyone to check in. For trauma survivors, even the smallest triggers or stressors from the day may impact their emotions, so acknowledging how everyone feels sets the foundation for the session.


2. Focus on Emotional Regulation and Distress Tolerance: Trauma survivors often experience heightened emotional reactions that feel uncontrollable. DBT's core skills—emotional regulation and distress tolerance—are especially important for this group. In a session, the facilitator might introduce a skill such as the "TIP" skills (Temperature, Intense Exercise, Paced Breathing) to help manage overwhelming emotions. The group would practice these techniques together, with the facilitator guiding them through the process step by step.


For trauma survivors, these skills are more than just tools—they represent a new way to interact with and manage emotions that once felt unbearable. Through repeated practice, group members can begin to see that they have the power to control their emotional responses, a key step in healing from trauma.


3. Validating and Sharing Experiences: One of the greatest benefits of DBT group counseling is the shared experience. For trauma survivors, isolation is often a major part of their journey—whether from shame, guilt, or fear of judgment. Being in a group of people who understand what it's like to struggle with similar emotional pain can be incredibly healing. DBT groups encourage validation—a key skill in trauma work. Facilitators may ask group members to share their personal experiences with emotions like anger, sadness, or fear, and the group will validate those feelings with empathy.


For example, if someone shares that they are feeling triggered by a memory of their trauma, the group might respond with a simple, "I hear you," or, "That sounds really tough." This validation helps trauma clients feel understood and seen, allowing them to process their emotions without judgment.


4. Focus on Mindfulness and Grounding: DBT is known for its emphasis on mindfulness—the practice of being present in the moment without judgment. For trauma clients, mindfulness can help them reconnect with their bodies and their emotions in a safe, non-reactive way. The facilitator might lead the group in a short mindfulness exercise to help clients stay grounded in the present moment.


For instance, the facilitator could guide participants through a body scan, where each person is encouraged to notice how their body feels, focusing on areas of tension or discomfort. This helps trauma survivors become more aware of their physical reactions, often providing insight into emotional triggers and learning to manage them in real-time.


5. Skill-Building for Relationships: Trauma can severely affect how individuals relate to others, sometimes leading to patterns of avoidance or hyper-vigilance. DBT helps trauma survivors develop healthier interpersonal skills by teaching them how to communicate more effectively, set boundaries, and trust others. In a group setting, members might role-play different interpersonal scenarios, practicing techniques like assertiveness, active listening, and effective boundary-setting. These skills are not just theoretical; they are tools that can be applied immediately in real-life situations.


6. The Healing Power of Group Support: Perhaps the most important aspect of DBT group counseling for trauma clients is the sense of community. Healing doesn’t happen in isolation. It happens when individuals come together to share their stories, support one another, and walk alongside each other in their healing journey. The group dynamic creates an environment of mutual support, where everyone feels both accountable and supported in their efforts to heal. The bonds that form in DBT groups can be incredibly powerful—providing members with a sense of belonging and understanding that they may have never experienced before.


Conclusion


A DBT group counseling session for trauma clients is more than just a therapeutic technique; it's a lifeline. It provides a safe space for survivors to work through the intense emotions that come with their experiences while offering the support of others who understand their struggles. DBT equips trauma survivors with the emotional regulation skills, mindfulness practices, and interpersonal strategies they need to move forward in their recovery. It allows them to feel seen, heard, and validated—and it helps them rebuild their sense of self and trust in others.


As we continue to evolve our understanding of trauma, we must ask ourselves: How can we create more spaces where trauma survivors can heal together, without feeling like they’re on this journey alone?


💬 Ready to start your own healing journey?


Book a session with one of our compassionate therapists at Moody Melon Counseling. We’re here when you’re ready. 🍉



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  • Writer: Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
    Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
  • Dec 12, 2024

Learning to feel loved again is a journey that begins with understanding your past and embracing the possibility of healing. With patience and self-compassion, you can rediscover the warmth of connection and learn to accept love, no matter the scars you've carried.

When Love Feels Foreign: Healing from Childhood Trauma and Learning to Feel Loved Again

For many of us, love is a feeling that comes naturally—a warm embrace from a parent, words of affirmation from a friend, or the simple joy of human connection. But for some, love isn’t instinctive. It’s learned, often after years of emotional numbness or neglect. Growing up in an environment where love was absent or conditional can leave emotional scars that make it difficult to feel loved—even when affection is given.


Imagine this: You’re given a hug. The arms around you are warm, the body pressing close feels comforting. But you feel nothing. No warmth. No connection. No sense of security. Just emptiness. For someone who’s experienced neglect or emotional abandonment as a child, a hug may feel like nothing more than a physical gesture. The love that’s supposed to come with it is absent.


This disconnection doesn’t make you broken; it simply means that the brain and heart have learned to block out love as a defense mechanism—a coping strategy for trauma. But that doesn’t mean healing isn’t possible. You don’t have to live your whole life feeling unworthy or incapable of receiving love. Here’s why and how you can begin to feel loved again, even after the wounds of childhood neglect.


When Love Doesn’t Feel Real: The Roots of Emotional Numbness


For those who grew up without love, their emotional experience is often shaped by neglect, abuse, or inconsistency in caregiving. As children, our brains are wired to seek safety, connection, and affection from our caregivers. When those basic needs aren’t met—whether through abandonment, emotional or physical abuse, or even just a lack of nurturing—our emotional development can be stunted. The result? An inability to recognize or accept love, even when it’s given freely.


For example, consider someone who grew up in an environment where their caregivers were emotionally unavailable or unpredictable. They may have learned to suppress their feelings to avoid the pain of abandonment. As adults, they might struggle to feel anything when someone offers kindness or affection, even if that person genuinely cares.


Another common scenario involves people who were raised in abusive households. They may have been repeatedly told they weren’t good enough or that love was conditional on their behavior. For them, being hugged or told “I love you” could trigger discomfort or even anger, because they’ve internalized that love is a tool for control, not a source of comfort.


Other Examples of Love Feeling Foreign:


  • The ‘Perfectionist’ Syndrome: A person raised in an environment where love was only given when they succeeded or behaved perfectly may feel a deep sense of unworthiness. They might find it hard to accept compliments or affection because they feel they haven’t earned it.


  • The Isolated Survivor: Some children grow up in emotionally or physically isolating environments, where emotional connection is scarce. As adults, they may struggle to trust others or find it difficult to form close relationships, even though they long for connection.


  • The Abandoned Child: A person whose primary caregiver abandoned them or was emotionally absent might never learn how to receive affection. When offered love, it can feel like a foreign concept, something they don’t deserve or can’t understand.


So, What Can You Do?


The first step toward healing is acknowledging the impact of your past on your present. Understanding that your inability to feel loved is a result of your trauma, not a reflection of your worth, is essential to healing. It’s not about changing who you are; it’s about learning how to open up to the love that is already around you.


Here are a few ways to begin reconnecting with love, both from others and from yourself:


1. Allow Yourself to Feel Safe


Start by creating a safe emotional space for yourself. This might mean seeking therapy or counseling to work through past trauma. Talking to a professional can help you untangle the feelings that block love, such as fear of vulnerability or deep-seated shame.


2. Practice Self-Compassion


It’s easy to feel unworthy of love when you’ve been taught that you’re not good enough. But self-compassion is the antidote. Start by being gentle with yourself. Recognize that your feelings are valid, and give yourself permission to feel worthy of love—because you are.


3. Learn to Accept Affection Gradually


If you’ve grown up without affection, receiving love can feel uncomfortable or even frightening. Start small. Let yourself receive simple acts of kindness without trying to analyze or push them away. Whether it’s a hug, a compliment, or a kind gesture, try to just be present in the moment, without judgment.


4. Reframe What Love Means


Love doesn’t always come in the form of big gestures. Sometimes, love is found in the quiet moments of connection: a cup of coffee shared with a friend, a kind word, a moment of silence with someone who understands you. Reframe love as something consistent and steady, not just a momentary feeling of euphoria.


5. Seek Out Healthy Relationships


Surround yourself with people who show genuine, unconditional care for you. Being in a safe, healthy relationship—whether with a partner, friend, or even a pet—can help you rediscover the feeling of being loved. Healthy relationships teach us how to receive love in a safe, nurturing environment.


6. Start With Physical Touch


Sometimes, learning to feel loved again can begin with physical touch. If a hug feels uncomfortable, try holding hands with someone you trust or sitting side by side without speaking. Gradually, your body will learn that closeness can be comforting, not threatening.


7. Be Patient With Yourself


Healing takes time, and that’s okay. It’s not a race to "get over" your past, but a journey of healing at your own pace. Every step you take toward accepting love is a victory, no matter how small.


You Are Not Alone: Healing Is Possible


The road to feeling loved again may seem long, especially if your childhood was marked by trauma and neglect. But you don’t have to carry this weight alone. Healing is possible, and with the right support and tools, you can learn to feel the love that has always been there, waiting for you to embrace it.


Remember, you are worthy of love—not because of what you’ve been through, but simply because you exist. Your past doesn’t have to define your future.


If you’ve struggled with feeling loved due to childhood trauma, know that there is always hope for change. Love is something you can learn to feel again, one step at a time. And the first step? Just knowing that you deserve it.


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  • Writer: Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
    Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
  • Nov 21, 2024

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) helps individuals heal from accident trauma by challenging irrational beliefs and promoting healthier thought patterns. Through its focus on emotional resilience, REBT empowers survivors to reframe their experiences, reducing anxiety and enhancing recovery.

Recovering with Reason: How REBT Helps Heal from Accident Trauma

Accidents, whether minor or life-altering, can leave lasting emotional scars. Beyond the physical recovery, many individuals also struggle with trauma that affects their mental health, from anxiety and depression to feelings of helplessness. Thankfully, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), a type of cognitive-behavioral therapy, offers a powerful tool for overcoming the mental toll of such events.


What is REBT?


Developed by Albert Ellis in the 1950s, REBT is a therapeutic approach based on the idea that it’s not the events themselves, but the beliefs we hold about them, that cause emotional distress. By challenging irrational thoughts and replacing them with more rational, realistic ones, REBT empowers individuals to shift their mindset and build emotional resilience.


How REBT Helps with Accident Trauma


When a person experiences an accident, their first reaction may often be emotional: shock, anger, or overwhelming sadness. These responses are completely natural, but REBT helps individuals identify the beliefs behind their emotional reactions. For example, a person might believe: “I’ll never be the same again,” or “I’m weak for not recovering faster.” These beliefs can create feelings of hopelessness and despair.


Through REBT, individuals learn to challenge these irrational beliefs, replacing them with more rational thoughts like, “This event does not define me” or “I’m capable of recovering, but it may take time.” By reframing these negative thoughts, individuals can prevent them from spiraling into more serious mental health issues like PTSD or depression.


REBT Techniques for Overcoming Trauma


  1. ABC Model: One of the foundational tools in REBT is the ABC model, which stands for Activating event, Beliefs, and Consequences. For someone recovering from an accident, the activating event might be the trauma itself. The beliefs could range from rational thoughts (like "Accidents happen, and I will heal") to irrational ones (such as "This accident will ruin my life forever"). The consequences are the emotional and physical reactions that stem from those beliefs. REBT helps clients identify irrational beliefs and dispute them, leading to healthier emotional responses.


  2. Disputing Irrational Beliefs: A key technique in REBT is learning how to dispute irrational beliefs. When negative thoughts arise, such as “I’m never going to be the same,” clients are encouraged to ask themselves: “Is that absolutely true?” “Is it helpful?” Through this process, individuals learn to replace exaggerated, harmful beliefs with more practical and hopeful ones, enabling them to regain their mental strength.


  3. Self-Acceptance and Compassion: Accident trauma can lead people to feel ashamed, weak, or even unworthy of support. REBT emphasizes unconditional self-acceptance, teaching clients to be kind to themselves as they recover. Instead of berating themselves for not healing faster, individuals learn to practice self-compassion and recognize that recovery is a process — and it's okay to seek help along the way.


Real-World Application of REBT in Accident Recovery


One of the greatest strengths of REBT is that it is action-oriented. In practical terms, this means that individuals who have experienced accidents can begin to use REBT tools almost immediately, whether in therapy or on their own. By incorporating REBT techniques into daily life, individuals are empowered to confront their trauma in a way that is rational, healthy, and ultimately transformative.


For instance, if someone is afraid of getting behind the wheel after a car accident, REBT can help them reframe thoughts like "Driving is dangerous, and I’ll never be safe again" into more balanced ones, such as "Driving involves risks, but I can take steps to drive safely and regain my confidence over time." These shifts in mindset can drastically reduce anxiety and help people reclaim control over their lives.


Conclusion


Overcoming trauma is never a linear journey, and recovery takes time and patience. However, through REBT, individuals who have suffered from accident trauma can reclaim their emotional health and find peace of mind again. By challenging irrational beliefs and replacing them with more rational, balanced thoughts, REBT offers a path forward that is both empowering and healing.


As we all know, healing is a marathon, not a sprint — but with REBT, you have the mental tools to run the race with strength, clarity, and hope.


Final Thought: Whether you’ve experienced a recent accident or are still dealing with past trauma, REBT provides a therapeutic framework that encourages you to change your perspective, so you can heal with confidence.


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