Anxiety Isn’t the Enemy—It’s a Messenger: 5 Surprisingly Simple Steps to Manage Daily Overwhelm

Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
Jul 23
4 min read

Updated: Oct 3

Feeling scattered or stuck in anxiety? These simple steps to manage daily overwhelm can help you ground your mind, calm your body, and regain a sense of control. You don’t need a total life overhaul—just a few simple steps to manage daily overwhelm and move through your day with more ease and clarity.

Anxiety Isn’t the Enemy—It’s a Messenger: 5 Surprisingly Simple Steps to Manage Daily Overwhelm

Most people think anxiety is the enemy—something to fight off, push down, or hide from. But what if we told you anxiety was actually trying to help?

Anxiety is your body’s built-in alarm system, tuned to protect you from threat and alert you to stress. But in today’s fast-paced, always-on culture, your nervous system may be firing off false alarms constantly. When the system is overloaded, everyday worries can feel overwhelming—causing tension, irritability, sleep disruption, and a chronic sense of dread.

The good news? You don’t need to overhaul your life to feel better. With the right tools, anxiety can become something you respond to—not something you react to.

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Here are five surprisingly simple, science-backed steps to begin managing daily anxiety in real-time:

1. Name It to Tame It

The first step to calming anxious feelings is to acknowledge them—without judgment.

When you label what you’re feeling (e.g., "I’m feeling overwhelmed," or "This feels like fear"), you activate your brain’s language and reasoning center—the prefrontal cortex—and calm activity in the amygdala, the part responsible for triggering anxiety responses.

This strategy, known as affect labeling, has been supported by neuroscience research. UCLA studies found that simply naming an emotion reduces its intensity. Instead of spiraling or numbing out, naming what you feel allows you to stay grounded and curious.

Try this: “I notice my chest feels tight, and I’m worrying about the meeting. This is anxiety, not danger.”

This simple shift creates distance between you and the emotion, which gives you more choice in how you respond.

2. Stick to the Rule of 3

When you’re anxious, even small tasks can feel impossible. A cluttered to-do list only adds to the pressure.

That’s where the Rule of 3 comes in: Start each day by writing down just three things you want to accomplish. Not a massive checklist. Not a long-term plan. Just three doable goals.

This technique helps:

Reduce overwhelm by limiting your focus
Build momentum through quick wins
Remind your brain that progress—not perfection—is the goal

Example:

Respond to two emails
Take a walk during lunch
Set a 10-minute timer to tidy up your space

The Rule of 3 helps you reclaim control and creates a sense of achievement that quiets anxiety's “you’re falling behind” narrative.

3. Interrupt the Spiral (with Your Senses)

Anxiety pulls you into the future: What if this happens? What if I mess up? What if it never gets better?

The antidote? Ground yourself in the present moment.

The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique is a mindfulness tool that engages your five senses to stop racing thoughts and bring your nervous system back into balance.

Try this right now:

5 things you can see
4 things you can touch
3 things you hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste

By focusing on your environment, you short-circuit the anxiety spiral and anchor your awareness in what’s real—right here, right now.

It’s especially useful in moments of panic, overstimulation, or feeling “disconnected from your body.”

4. Create a 90-Second Pause

Here's a fascinating fact: The body’s initial chemical response to stress lasts about 90 seconds. After that, it’s your thoughts that continue fueling the fire.

This means if you can interrupt the first 90 seconds, you can stop the reaction from growing into full-blown panic.

Try pausing before you act:

Step outside for fresh air
Take 10 slow breaths
Splash cold water on your face
Stretch your shoulders and neck

This doesn’t mean ignoring what you feel—it means creating space between the stimulus and your response.

Example: Instead of sending that angry email immediately, walk away, take 90 seconds, and check back in with your wise mind. You may still want to send it—or not. But now you’ve responded intentionally.

5. Treat Yourself Like a Friend

Anxiety often comes with a harsh inner critic: “You’re weak. You should’ve handled this better. Why can’t you just be normal?”

Here’s the truth: If you spoke to a friend the way you speak to yourself, you wouldn’t have many left.

Practicing self-compassion helps regulate anxiety by reducing shame, increasing resilience, and calming the nervous system.

Try saying:

“This is a hard moment, and I’m not alone in this.”
“It’s okay to feel anxious. I can still take a small step forward.”
“I’m doing the best I can with what I have today.”

Research shows self-compassion isn’t soft or lazy—it’s one of the strongest predictors of emotional resilience.

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Final Thoughts

You don’t have to eliminate anxiety to live well with it. These five small, science-supported practices give your brain and body more flexibility to respond with calm and clarity.

Over time, you’ll begin to build emotional strength—and anxiety will lose its power to control your day.